***the image of this article is symbolic in that it is a heart made of beautiful red roses gradually transforming into dark, thorny vines. It captures the contrast between romantic illusion and hidden entrapment.
Love should feel like a slow-burning fire—steady, warm, and built to last. But sometimes, it hits like a wildfire: all-consuming, intoxicating, and too
intense to be real.
If you’ve ever been in a relationship where the beginning felt like a fairytale, only to watch it turn into a nightmare of emotional distance and
confusion, you’ve likely been love bombed.
What Is Love Bombing?
Love bombing is an excessive, overwhelming display of affection, attention, and commitment in the early stages of a relationship. It’s
not love—it’s manipulation.
The goal?
To create emotional dependency so that when the love bomber pulls away, you’re left scrambling to regain their attention, wondering
what you did wrong.
Spoiler: you didn’t do anything wrong.
The Cycle of Love Bombing
-
The Overwhelming Beginning
– They pursue relentlessly—texts, calls, gifts, constant attention.
– They want to be with you all the time, and you start feeling like you have to carve out time just to breathe.
– They say all the right things: “You’re my soulmate,” “I’ve never felt this way before,” “I want to spend my life with you.”
– It feels too good to be true—because it is.
-
The Shift
– Once they feel like they have you, the effort fades.
– They suddenly seem distant, distracted, or less interested.
– You go from being the center of their world to an afterthought.
– You start questioning yourself: Did I do something wrong?
-
The Emotional Rollercoaster
– You chase the high of how things were at the beginning.
– They might breadcrumb you with just enough affection to keep you hooked.
– You’re left feeling insecure, confused, and anxious—always trying to get back to the “perfect” beginning.
Why They Do It
Not all love bombers are calculated manipulators. Some are just emotionally immature, addicted to the rush of new love but incapable of real, lasting intimacy. They crave validation, the thrill of the chase, but once the relationship settles into normalcy, they lose interest—and move on to their next high.
How to Spot Love Bombing Early
– Fast & Intense: If someone is declaring their undying love within weeks, that’s a red flag, not romance.
– Over-the-Top Gestures: Excessive gifts, grand promises, and pushing for deep commitment way too soon.
– Lack of Boundaries: They don’t respect your personal space or time—you feel smothered.
– Inconsistency: Once they “have” you, their attention and effort start to drop.
– You Feel Addicted: If their love feels like a drug—intoxicating, then crushing when withdrawn—it’s not love.
How to Protect Yourself – PLEASE learn to protect yourself
- Slow it Down: Real love builds over time. If it’s too much, too soon, take a step back.
- Trust Patterns, Not Promises: Words are easy; actions over time reveal the truth.
- Maintain Independence: If you feel like you’re losing yourself in the relationship, something is wrong.
- Set Boundaries: Love shouldn’t feel like being overwhelmed—it should feel like being understood.
Final Thoughts
If you’ve been love bombed, don’t blame yourself. These people don’t love—you were just their emotional fix.
The good news? You survived, you learned, and now, you won’t fall for it again.
You dodged a bullet – thank the heavens for that!
And here’s the thing: they’ll do the same thing to the next victim.
It’s a cycle, not a fluke. It is their pattern.
It’s a dopamine hit for them.
Real love isn’t overwhelming in the beginning – – it’s consistent over time. People like this are emotionally
inconsistent, impulsive, delusional, desperate, and most likely incapable of DEEP, LASTING commitment.
Next time, you’ll recognize that true love isn’t a whirlwind—it’s a steady, unwavering presence.
And as for the love bomber?
They’ll keep chasing the next high, never realizing the problem was never the people they love bombed…
It was THEM
It is still THEM
They are their own problem.
Self-sabotaging? Maybe.
Love who you are, love the fact that you were real from the get-go. You were genuine and they…..
they are still who they are, still playing the game of cat and mouse only to continue ending up in the same
predicament because they
are incapable of being REAL
